“The funny thing about introverts is once they feel comfortable with you, they can be the funniest, most enjoyable people to be around. It’s like a secret they feel comfortable sharing with you. Except the secret is their personality”—(via c0gnaclilac)
I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”
My friends mom is 4’9 and her dad is 6’5. Whenever she is mad at him, she grabs a chair to yell in his face. Everytime that happens, he’s laughing too hard for her to stay mad. They say it’s the only way they’ve been married for so long.
so let me get this straight. anti-choicers took $500,000 dollars worth of pennies and sealed them in a glass case as a “memorial” to “victims” of abortion. i’m going to say that again. these people have locked away $500,000 dollars as a “tribute” to dead blobs of cells instead of donating that money to actual living breathing children who don’t have basic necessities or homes.
“You will be stupid. You will worry your parents. You will question your own choices, your relationships, your jobs, your friends, where you live, what you studied in college, that you went to college at all… If that happens, you’re doing it right.”—Ira Glass (via stay-ocean-minded)
if you ever call me annoying, even if it’s just jokingly, the chances of me ever speaking to you again are slim to none because I’ll be so afraid that every little word or sound that comes out of my mouth will aggravate you and make you cringe and hate my existence
my favorite thing about fashion is that you can find the ugliest or blandest or most commonly seen piece of clothing in a department store, but so long as its by a certain designer, it could cost as much as rent
GOOD THING THIS IS ON SALE, NOW I CAN REALLY AFFORD THIS